Richard, thank you for the post. I also have a parent (father) with bipolar disorder that first manifested when I was seven years old. Thank goodness my mother decided to tell all of us (4 children) what Dad was going through. I have diary entries saying ?Dad had to be taken away to a hospital today. He will not be coming back for a while. He has to take medicine everyday forever.? Because I grew up with that knowledge and an understanding of what bipolar disorder is, my family was able to help another person. When my older brother started to manifest at the age of sixteen, we were able to connect him with doctors and medication to help him succeed. My father and mother have not had an easy time with the illness and the social stigma of having a "mental disorder" was never easy. As a result of being an open book with our friends and community, many additional opportunities to help others have been afforded us and all my siblings do not have to harbor a ?secret.? Knowledge is power and you are exercising a powerful muscle by telling your story.

Also, I agree with your statements about treatment options. I have seen my father at his most frail moments without his medication and honestly, it is frightening on both ends (depressed and manic). Granted, we may be a family of "geneses" but functioning in everyday society is something that is very important to each of us. Thank you for using your personal experience to address that hotly debated topic.

Thank you again for posting this message and taking the time to tell your story. You are helping someone today!

Thanks for posting this, Richard. What's the name of this play, and this theater? I'd like to be able to recommend it to people i know in the NYC area.

Like you, I am close to some people with bipolar disorder, and I know how difficult this illness can be -- not just because of the difficulty in treating it effectively, and not just because of the chaos it causes, but also because of the layers of shame and secrecy often attached to it.

As a matter of fact, about a year ago I did a survey on my weblog Contentious asking people about their comfort level with various types of personal disclosures on web sites that they read mainly for professional reasons. The second most negative reaction I found was to a hypothetical disclosure of depression -- a very common mood disorder.

See: http://contentious.com/archives/2005/08/16/survey-question-5-disclosure-of-mental-illness

Shame and fear are two big reasons why any kind of mental illness goes untreated, mistreated, or under-treated. And obviously, with lack of understanding of mental health issues so widespread and mentall illness still being generally taboo, mentally ill people do have reason to fear others' reactions.

I figure one of the best things we can do to improve the outlook for everyone's mental health is to be willing to discuss mental illness frankly and in constructive terms -- as you've done here. Bravo.

- Amy Gahran

How refreshing to hear people talk so candidly and openly about Mental Health.The fear and stigma attached to these issues such as bipolar are still very evident, especially in the UK. Here in the UK on BBC1 they are running a documentary series presented by Stephen Fry interviewing celebrities who suffer from the disease. Stephen Fry who has bipolar disorder says "There's no doubt that I do have extremes of moods that are greater than just about anybody else I know." The series is great as it has really lifted the lid on the issues surrounding mental health,exposing the disease and showing how it affects suffers and their family. In my support I am running in The Great North Run this Sunday 1st Oct 06, a half a marathon in the aid of Mind the Mental Health Charity and lots of lovely people here at Edelman London have sponsored me- so thank you all so very much.If anyone else would like to donate to this event, they can do so my clicking on the link below http://www.justgiving.com/lindyloo I must remember when running that exercise is excellent for your mental health or so the voices in my head tell me! Posted by Linda Hall at September 26, 2006 5:35 AM

Richard,

Your dad gave me my very first job 20 years ago and I have always considered him to be one of my role models for a number of reasons both in business and in life. While I didn't know of your mother's illness I am not at all surprised at how successfully she and your family have faced these challenges.

My daughter has a hearing loss and has had to where hearing aids since kindergarten. We have always told her that this was her gift from God and what she chose to do with it was up to her. For her it was never an excuse but a reason to do even more.

It is hard to remember that no matter what challenges we are given in life it is always better to own them as a part of the journey!

Thanks for the great post!

Richard,

Thanks for the courage to deal with a personal family medical challenge head on in your blog. Let us pray that it spurs others to seek the help they need for themselves, family members and friends. You are an inspiration for all of us who try to deal with the world in an open and truthful manner. Not only good for us personally, but also professonally as PR counselors.

Bill Church

Richard - amongst the many things I have read today, this is the standout piece. It is deeply personal but relevant to us all - your message is powerful and affecting.

I met Marilynn Mobley from your Atlanta office at a Duke University event last night. She directed me to your blog after I recalled with fondness your parents. Thank goodness for your openness on the subject, and that your Mom sought help. I know two marriages that the condition ravaged, and I am happy to know your parents are doing well together, and that your mother plays an active role in helping others affected. Best regards to all your family, especially your mother, who was most welcoming to me and my sister in Chicago years ago.

Your story reminded me of Chicago Magazine's Rebecca Cutler. Her parents created a foundation in her honor:

http://www.rebeccacutlerfoundation.org/rebecca-dream.html

You should get in touch with them.

Sincerely,
Rita

Richard,

I was actually looking at your website (since its content has been praised) and found your blog. Just sent it to my daughter Meredith, a college sophomore who was diagnosed bipolar at 14. In hindsight she's likely had it since early childhood. Meredith is remarkable --she's one of the most articulate and resilient people I know. She is also very open about her disease. Not only does she have bipolar but she struggles with learning differences and another chronic illness as well. She is starting a mental health advocacy group at her school Alma College. In high school she testified before our state legislature for better treatment and insurance coverage for those with mental illnesses and even wrote her college essay about being bipolar.

Thank you so much for sharing this story!

Although I am not very familiar with manic depression, major depression runs in my family. Therefore, I have very strong opinions on this topic and I am extremely passionate about creating awareness of this widespread and often misunderstood illness. From my experience, understanding depression as a medical illness instead of a "character flaw" usually only comes when someone you know and love experiences it. Suddenly, the magnitude and devastation of this illness becomes so real, and you truly recognize the need for treatment.

I always say that having a mother, and several other family members who have had depression, is both the most negative, and the most positive aspect of my life. To see someone you love become a different person because of depression is devastating; but to see them overcome the illness and emerge as a stronger person - ironically - makes it all worth it.

Much like you, my story has a happy ending. Every one of my family members who has been diagnosed with depression has also reaped the benefits of anti-depressants, making me a strong advocate for treatment as well. They are all leading happy, healthy and fulfilling lives and, along with your mother, have garnered a great amount of respect from everyone that has the honor of being around them ... myself included.

Dear Richard:

In a phone call last night with Elaine, she happened to mention your blog on your mother's bipolar disorder. I got up early this morning to read it, and was bowled over by what I read. Not for the reasons you might first assume, however.

My 11-year-old-son, Patrick, has early onset bipolar disorder. We had known something wasn't quite "right" with Patrick from the time he was 3. After 5 years of taking him from one therapist or psychiatrist to another, and chasing many misdiagnoses, we were lucky enough to find a professional at Mass General who could tell us what was going on with him.

I am so proud to see that you're sharing your mom's diagnosis with the world via your blog. If I had known the extent of bipolar disorder in Steve's (my husband's) family, we might have saved years of agonizing over what was wrong with our little boy, and wondering why we were such awful parents that we were raising a son who threw hour-long temper tantrums at the age of 7, had no friends, and couldn't seem to stop beating up his big brother.

I had heard stories that Steve's paternal aunt and possibly an uncle, might have suffered from manic depression, but it wasn't talked about in his family It wasn't until we got Patrick's diagnosis and I called up his aunt in Michigan to ask her if it was true that she was bipolar, that I found out, "bipolar disorder runs rampant through our family" (her words). Now I've taken it upon myself to talk to Steve's extended family about this disease and what they should look out for in their own kids. I wish my in-laws and some of Steve's other relatives realized the potential harm they were causing by pretending it's not happening and thinking that maybe it would just go away if they ignored the problem.

I always heard that parenthood brings more worries with it than any other change in your life, and I never believed it more than when I had a bipolar child. I worry about his face puffing up from all the Lithium he takes. I worry about the side effects of the antipsychotic medicines he takes. I worry about him succeeding in school when he's too wrung out at the end of the day to pay attention because he's had to hold his emotions in check all day. I worry about whether he'll ever be able to live on his own. I worry that one of my other kids or my husband will exhibit symptoms some day. I worry about Social Services coming to our home one day because Patrick has lost it and, in a raging fit, has pushed his little brother into a brick wall.

I can find myself starting to wallow in self-pity and worry about what will happen to this kid, but then I have to focus on the good things. We are so blessed to live where we do -- we see a psychiatric nurse practitioner whose supervising MD is one of the top experts in the country on pediatric bipolar disorder, and we have a wonderful family therapist. (If they could just find a BP drug that worked on an ongoing basis. The drug merry-go-round can be maddening -- you find one combination that works, then he grows two inches or has some new hormones kick in and it throws the whole thing out of whack.)

But you're right about it being best not to feel sorry about it. Patrick's situation can be heartbreaking if I let myself think about it too much, so I try to think about the incredible gifts we've been given in this child. He's extremely bright (although he suffers from some executive function disabilities common with BP kids), has a witty sense of humor, is very generous, and has a heart of gold when he's feeling stable. He has a passion for WWII history and the space program, and can outfox any adult on his knowledge of both. He has a prodigious memory, never forgets anything he's read, and is great to have around to help with the Sunday crossword puzzle.

Anyway, I just wanted to congratulate you for having the courage to share your very personal family history on the web, and to let you know that, once you tell your story, it's amazing how many people you'll find who can relate personally to what you've been through.

Libby

Richard:
This is a profound posting.
Thank you for your leadership in telling us this aspect of your story with such truth and clarity.
It offers a great lesson in so many areas. All we really have is the truth of our story and when we tell it - it creates connectedness with others.
It is my ideal in being a communicator.
Your courage and straightforwardness are inspiring.
Connie